He thought carefully about the plans he made, trying to find a flaw. For the sake of his children, this had to look like an accident. All the upbeat videos should reinforce that it was an accident.He felt foolish, but was compelled to speak."I never worried much about you, you know. I took my kids to church for years, because I felt they needed to be exposed to you. I never really felt you in church. I guess there were too many people competing for your attention." No, I felt you in the wind. In the warm sun and rain that made my crops grow, in the beauty of a perfect crop, bound to nourish people I would never meet. And I saw you a few times too, in the faces of my children. I want to thank you for all that." I know what I'm about to do is a sin according to some. I admit I'm doing it partly for me, the thought of dying by inches doesn't appeal to me at all. But, mostly I'm doing it for my children. I can't stand the thought of forcing them to watch me fade away until only a shell is. Checking in with the people on the ship, getting my room key and heading down to put my things away. Even during winter, it’s nice and warm in Mexico… slipping out of my clothes: jeans, pink shiny thong, gray bra, and black t-shirt… dropping them onto the floor, opening my suitcase and digging around through it to find my bikini. Pulling my pink and blue bikini out of my suitcase and laying it on my bed… walking to the bathroom nude and looking at my body in the mirror. Then walking back to the bed, picking up my top and sliding the neck string over my neck and pulling the cups down over my breasts, reaching behind me and tying my top… then reaching down for the bottoms, setting into them and sliding them up over my hips. Now that I’m dressed, I grab a towel and key and head for the deck to lie out and just relax.I walk up the stairs, and notice that there aren’t that many people around on the deck and no one is in the pool. I find a chair close to the edge so I can look off the.
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