No one ever wrote to Proctor and Gamble to tell them how effective their washing powder was on cats.There was always a problem with the geese, the goat and the dog, which would follow you down the road if you went out, and to cap it all there were chickens. Father, when asked what he did for a living on one occasion said 'Poultry Advisor'. When we asked what he meant he told us he could advise anyone not to keep them. In those days you could inject a pill into the male birds to turn them into 'capons' basically I think a sort of chemical neutering, and we did quite few of these, by the hundred actually. Whether this chemical had any effect on the humans who consumed them I have no idea, but I do have three children, who have qualified me to become a 'Parent Advisor'. I'm sure you can work out what that entails!And then there was the vicar, a genuine self sufficiency addict. He had, he told me, a problem with rabbits that were eating his vegetables. He had a reasonably sized tree. The place is packed with girls everywhere. Definitely a lot more girls than guys.Sarah’s eyes light up as she sees me. Her blonde hair neatly coming down to her shoulders. “You came!”“I told you I would,” I laugh. “This is my roommate and best friend, Andrew. Andrew, this is Sarah, the girl in my math class.”“It’s nice to meet you,” she says. “Do you guys want something to drink?”“Yeah, sure,” I shrug.We follow her through the house, into the kitchen, where a giant jug cooler is. She grabs two cups and hand them to us. “Normally we charge $5 per cup for guests, but you two can drink on me.”“Aww, thanks. Such nice hospitality.” I give her my heart-stopping smile which turns her cheeks pink. I can admit she has really beautiful eyes. So green and verdant.We fill our cups with jungle juice and follow Sarah out to the back porch.“So, how long have you two been friends?” she asks.“Since kindergarten,” I laugh.“Wow, that’s so cool,” she says.“Yeah, we grew up next door to each other,” he.
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