But Jake was still being lowered into the ground. What difference did it make who or what had killed him?The screaming resumed later that afternoon, when the tranquilizers wore off. She refused to take any more of them. She didn't like dodging the pain of her boy's death. It felt wrong. It felt like betrayal. She would bear the pain of his death, just as she'd borne the pain of his birth. She would wait in agony, screaming as she allowed the pain to ravish through her soul, tearing pieces of it away as the minutes passed into hours. She re-lived every moment of his life, from the first time she'd held him, feeling him softly suckling at her breast, to the last time she'd kissed him goodnight, and everything in between. And she remembered every single time she'd ever scolded and screamed at him too, and the times she'd let him cry all alone because she was too busy to worry about every little issue he had. The wha- ifs and if-onlys, stabbed at her like a sadistic mob, blaming her,. What did he want?“Hey there, do you speak English?” It was obvious he was exotically foreign by his accent; but his English flowed perfectly, and she couldn’t quite pin the origin.“Hi,” was all she said back, her head wavering slowly like she was looking for his reason to approach her. He had a naughty kind of look in his eyes, and a slight matching pout on his lips that contagiously sprouted on hers as well. “Can I help you?”He shrugged, keeping solemn. “Probably not.” Cassie’s eyebrows twitched. Was that all?“You know,” he began, and Cassie smelled a pickup line following—some sort of reason to chat to the topless girl on the beach. “You ought to use a heavier sunblock.” Cassie’s eyebrow twitched again, this time into a confused frown.“The rays here can be very strong, and there’s not really much of an ozone layer to protect you in this country.” He nodded up to the star with the diagonal of his eye. “Could get burnt, hm?”Cassie let out a brief laugh. “Oh really now. I’ll have to.
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