So I held back, and I lived my sex-life for that time vicariously, through my girlfriends, listening to them talk about their men, and how much their men had spent on them. One got diamonds for her fifteenth birthday, one got a full-length fur for Christmas, one got taken on a cruise by her man on Valentine’s Day weekend, and one got a car . . . just because, even though she wasn’t old enough to have a driver’s license! And they were all getting fucked like bunnies and going absolutely CRAZY for it. And what did I get? Jealous.On my fifteenth birthday, I had a date with Bennett, my "boyfriend" from school. I was a freshman and he was a senior, so he had a car and we went to a nice restaurant, and then to a bar (we both had fake IDs: you know that story). We stayed out late, and we did the dirty for awhile (to the limited extent that Bennett knew how to do the dirty) at the apartment of his older brother (I even let them take turns on me, and STILL wasn’t satisfied). Can you see where. We’ve had our ups and downs, and quite frankly, I never expected to have feelings for another man, but here I am. I’ve never acted on them, never cheated on Leon, but I have been guilty of emotional infidelity, I suppose. As for David, well, I adore him. I respect him. I ache with desire for him. It’s ... something new and exciting, and yet I still have many feelings, many thoughts regarding Leon. What do I say, that I’m sorry that I fell in love with another man while married to him?“I never stepped out, never broke my marriage vows physically, yet I strayed from them by experiencing emotions that I wasn’t permitted to feel. Is there any hope for my marriage and do you even care? You’re a minister! Tell me, do you give a damn about what could happen to my marriage now that you’ve spilled my secret?” Robin surprised me by breaking out into actual tears in front of me.I reached for Robin and she came to me, my arms holding her close as I let her cry on my shoulder. She was a bit.
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