Our parents had taken a six-week European tour and rather than drag us along they shipped us off to Grandma's house which was an hour north of Green Bay. She had a three-bedroom cottage on Lake Michigan complete with dock, canoes and absolute privacy for a half mile in any direction. My brother and I hated it. Don't get me wrong, my grandma was one of the coolest old people I knew and we were glad to stay with her but we were not glad to be so isolated from our friends for half the fucking summer.It took Russ and me about two days to get completely and utterly bored. Grandma came into the kitchen early on the fourth morning and said “This isn't going to work, you two moping around like the world has ended, we need to find something to keep you occupied.”“What?” asked my brother.Granny looked at him then me and pointed out the window, “We'll start by canoeing to that little island out there where we can picnic, it is mystical, magical, and has always been a special place for our. But to me--ah, to me, she was the ultimate object of beauty and desire."Eighteen is such a special birthday. You should have something that you really want a lot," Mom continued."Well, Mom, what I really want a lot is a big hug and kiss from my favorite Mom."Mom laughed. "Oh, you can have that anytime," she said."Yes, but now that I will become a man, I want a real adult kiss. You know, not just a mommy kiss, but a woman kiss." Well, most mommies do tend to be women," Mom said playfully."Yes, and my Mommy is a woman I would sure love to get a real woman kiss from. You know what I mean." Hmm. I'm not too sure about that idea." Well, OK, but I thought you said you wanted to give me something I really wanted a lot. I guess you didn't actually mean it." Now wait a minute!" Mom protested. "Of course I meant it. Uh--you are just joking, aren't you--about the kiss, I mean." No, Mom, I definitely am not joking. What I would really like most is a big honest-to-goodness adult kiss from my.
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