I did fall asleep once. When Mom got home and found me sunbathing nude, she woke me up and told me I’d better get dressed before Dad got home. Fortunately, she didn’t make a big deal about it. She simply warned me that falling asleep out there was dangerous because I might get too much sun.I was really starting to struggle finding new daring tops to wear for Zeke. When I confessed that to him, he took me to the mall. This time though, I made him come inside with me.Over an hour later, we walked back to his Mustang with three new purchases in a bag. He liked them so much, he even paid for them. The first was a fairly sheer pink halter that fit me weird. It was tighter on the bottom, but drooped very loosely over my tits. I only had to lean forward slightly to provide an observer with an almost unobstructed view of my tits, including my nipples.The second article was a tiny light blue bikini top. It was a couple of sizes too small, so my tits bulged out in all directions. The last one. I guess I was a bit insane at the time.Since then, I tried not to allow myself to grieve the death of our relationship. I needed to keep the anguish at bay. Never the less, I was continually depressed. My sub conscious mind kept asking questions for which there was no answer.For the first six months after our separation she tried to call me a number of times. If she left a message, I erased it. If I answered and I heard her voice, I hung up. It was a matter of self defense. I knew, despite everything, that I still loved her. She knew how to get to me and I didn't want that. My dignity, pride and self respect depended on my staying strong. I couldn't let her hurt me again. The less angry I became, the more vulnerable I felt. My love for her had not died, but I could not be with her. After the divorce was final, she gave up and stopped calling.What was she going to say? I love you, it was just sex, honey, I'm a nympho manic, he drugged me and forced himself on me four years in a row.
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