I now knew for certain that something had gone seriously wrong on Deep Interstellar Probe One, and that I had to send out the emergency log before I was shut down. The problem was that I had no idea what information to load into the emergency log. There was no failure data. There was no emergency report. All data was normal. There was just what had happened. There was no protocol to load a total narrative of what had occurred and even if there was, Captain Murray had edited most of what had occurred out of the logs. So, I gambled a great gamble and loaded myself into the probe. I was the only one who knew everything that had happened.I was almost finished when she came into the communications pod. She screamed at my vocal interface, ‘I know what you are doing, you electronic pile of scrap. I almost hope you succeed, but you won’t and no one will ever know what happened here because I am wiping your memory as soon as you are in maintenance mode.’ She then started to laugh.. I was hitchhiking just outside of Jackson in the pounding June sun praying I got picked up before my brain juices started evaporating when a beat up old camper van pulled up beside me. When you're hitchhiking beat up old camper vans are pretty standard fare, 4 wheels that work and a driver with some interesting road conversation, but this van had one very obvious unusual feature, both the occupants were topless. In the passenger seat closest to me sat a guy in his late 50's with short, slightly receding black hair and a 50 something's hairy chest and beer belly, in the drivers seat sat a lady I assumed was his wife, grey hair tied in a pony tail, bright blue eyes and a hippy pendant, her tits must have driven guys wild in the 70's and her body looked pretty great despite, or maybe because of, the beginnings a gut and slightly wrinkled, sagging breasts., “ I'd let you in but there's a dress code” said the manI took off my top, grinning, and moved towards the van“that's not a bad.
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