"Neither one would tell me specifically why they were against it and later, after it was too late, they both said that from the way I was carrying on I wouldn't have believed them any way and it would have made for bad feelings between us. They both had hoped I would find out from some one else before the wedding. I went back to JoAnne and told her that I'd talked to Bill and Jack and that nothing they had said had caused me to change my mind. She looked at me in disbelief:"You're kidding me! You still want to marry me even after talking to them?"I nodded my head 'yes'."Okay," she said, "Maybe you are just the kind of husband I need."The way she said it did not register at the time - only later did I come to understand what she'd said.We had been sharing each others bed since our third date so the build -up to the wedding didn't include sexual frustration, but it was still a trying time for me. Everybody I knew seemed to be against the marriage, but no one would ever give me a hint as. "I had this job waiting for me at the clinic. As you know, my brother Barry was a doctor there already. It made me a shoe-in for the nursing position. I started working the following week. It helped me get my mind off of the rape. I call it rape, because I didn't give willingly of myself. I know myself too well to think I would have jumped into a group scene."I missed my first period and it bothered me a little. When I missed my second one, I was scared. The only people I could talk to were my parents. I told them the whole story about the rape. We sat and cried together. Now, we had to decide what to do about the pregnancy."I basically had three choices. Abort the pregnancy, have the baby and give it up for adoption, or have the baby and keep it. I'm a nurse and we try to save lives. I decided against abortion. That made it between giving it up for adoption or keeping it. I must have changed my mind a hundred times while I was pregnant with Sara. About the seventh month I told my.
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