’ ‘Yeah?’ ‘Is it hot?’ ‘Yes.’ ‘Is it dirty?’ ‘Yes.’ ‘Is it sexual?’ ‘Yes.’ ‘Is it erotic?’ ‘Yes. If you’re into voyeurism.’ ‘Voyeurism?’ Cynthia pointed what she meant. What I fail to notice was a security camera hanging above the doorway and Cynthia failing to warn me. I couldn’t believe it. ‘Shit’, I said, ‘oh shit, why didn’t you tell me?’ ‘I thought you knew?’ ‘Me? I haven’t lived in this building that long. This is great. Fucking great.’ ‘What’s the problem?’ ‘What’s the problem? The security guys are going to play that tape and probably download it on the internet, with a bunch of computer nerds with mad hardons enjoying the show. Or put it on some pornsite where the whole world would be watching my dick hanging out. Those guys are probably a bunch of perverts that would sell that tape at a very high price.’ ‘Not unless we give them an encore.’ ‘Huh?’ I turned around and Cynthia stood before me slipping off the grey blazer showing that incredible, sexual, irresistible body of. "This is your captain speaking. Please make your way down to the main theater on deck five and put on your life vests, that are found in your storage lockers." Ann was struggling with her vest but I helped her. Then, like a kid she started blowing the whistle that is hanging on the vest. She laughed, as I said, "Come on, little girl, this is an adults-only cruise." The theater was huge and it was packed. There must have been several thousand people here. We were sitting next to a couple around our age. They were wearing matching yellow Hawaiian shirts. He had an obvious beer belly and she was a chunk with enormous boobs."Were you y'all from? We're from Austin," he asked, in a thick southern accent. Ann replied enthusiastically, "We're from California." "This is definitely not the cruise I was looking for!" I thought to myself as the Captain and his crew made their way onto the stage. As they went through their prepared speeches about safety and introduced the head crew person, I.
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