I can’t stand the space. I need you. So I close that space, sealing it completely. My body pressed tightly to yours from thigh to chest. Its not enough. I can feel every place I can’t feel you, through our clothes. I’m desperate to feel your skin again. Right here in your kitchen. Moments from your wife coming home, knowing that at any moment, she will come home. She will come back from the store and I will never have this chance again. I can’t breathe. I need you more than I have ever imagined needing anyone before. The way I pretend every time I go home to him. You are my heart and my air and I need you. Your mouth goes to my neck, sucking and kissing and I can’t think. Warning bells start screaming. You will leave marks. My skin is so pale and though I can feel you holding back, you’re being anything but gentle. How could you be? My head falls back and hits the cabinet. I feel the clunk and I feel you try to pull back. I feel your concern for me in my own chest, connected by this. Us din mujhe apne dost ki baaton pe gussa aaya lekin maine kuch nahi bola. Lekin meri maa ko leke mere man mein galat vichaar aagaye the.Agle din Sunday tha aur subha 11 baje maa kitty party mein chali gayi. Mere man mein pata nahi kya hua. Maine maa ke kapde ki almirah kholi. Aur dekha meri maa bade ache ache colour ke undergarments pehnti thi – jaise light green red purple pink.Aur maine dekha saari panty aur bra sirf do hi brand ki thi ek Jockey aur ek Madame. Maa ko high heels kaa bhi bahut shouk tha lekin aajkal nahi pehan rahi thi. Aur pata nahi mere man mein kya aaya. Maine maa ko ek sasti raand banane kaa socha.Hamare chacha rishtedaaro se bhi utne ache sambandh nahi the ki koi hume dekhne aaye hum kaha rehte hai. Us shaam maa ghar aayi aur maine maa ko apne pass bulaya. Aur maa se pucha ki aap high heels aur apne itne ache ache kapde ku nahi pehnte.To maa ne bola ab kuch fayda nahi. Maine maa ko khinch ke ek thappad lagaya. Maa seham gayi aur rone lagi aur puchne lagi ki.
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