However, in a case like this…But it’s just the first card, it tells me who I am right now, not what I have the potential to become. A robed skeleton on a bone horse. The harbinger of world-altering change. One part of the self dies so that new growth may occur. This is the card that ushers the Fool into the underworld. What if there is no new growth? What if the body dies along with that infirmed aspect of the self? This tells me nothing. I reach again for the deck. This crosses one Flip. The three of swords is my obstacle. Not surprising. A Heart pierced by three cruel blades, blood dripping off their tips. It indicates harsh words exchanged, wounds inflicted by callous thinking and wrongful assumptions. Words thrown in spite that can’t be taken back. Carl. He thought I was sleeping with Patrick. I wasn’t but I knew that he was getting suspicious, so you know what I did? I went out and fucked Patrick. He wouldn’t have done it, not sober, but I got him so drunk that he could barely. I noticed during our exchanges Della would tease me with a lazy eye look. The kind of look that meant she was possibly looking for more than just ...dinner. I tried to divert the conversation to issues that related to her friendship with Nina but Della kept eyeing me with that look of deceptive lust, maybe? Was I seeing what I wanted to see because this girls making me horny as fuck and I haven't had ANY pussy in nearly 2 months (ok, so I did pick up a lady from the gym a few months back and we ravaged each other for several weeks and yes she's MARRIED but there's a big difference between a 35 year old woman and an 18 and a half year old girl)?? A guy can only jack off so much before he relishes the real thing. I thought I was seeing what I wanted to see so the illusion of such a visual was far from reality changed instantly as soon as Della suggested that she stay a little while longer due to the rain and she suggested that we stream in a movie that's currently playing. It made.
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