All of them turned out to be girl's magazines or romance books."They're serious," I said aloud. "They really do want to turn me into agirl, this is just the start of it. They can't...I won't let them." Thenthoughts of possible decades stuck in prison came to mind, as well aswhat might happen to me in this strange place, beyond help from thelawyers. I might be "suicided". People kill themselves in prison everyyear out of despair so it would be easy to fake one and hang me with asheet.I made up my mind to do what I was told on the surface. Surely I couldstand a single year in this place, and when I was set free I could runto a lawyer and explain what had happened to me. If I was believed andthey didn't just laugh me out of court, and if the courts took my side,and surely they would as the judge sentenced me to youth custody, notforced feminisation, I might get compensation or at least get the rightto live my life as I wanted to.The next day I was taken from my cell and found three. How did the mantra work?’ With gusto I immediately responded, ‘The harder it is, the stronger I am.’ ‘Very good,’ She smiled. ‘After you practice here a few times, you can use it at home, or maybe in the quiet of your office.’ ‘That reminds me, I really should get back to church. Tomorrow morning, 5:15, at the Y’s pool. See you then. And thanks for the work-out and the smoothie.’ As I drove back to the church, the vivid image of the meditation was bouncing around in my head. ‘I really must be careful with her,’ I thought, ‘She could be real trouble for me.’ Little did I know how true that would be. TUESDAY MORNING Swimming was my weakest leg in a triathlon, so I was anxious to get any advice I could from Veronica. I tried not to think what she would look like in a swimsuit, but a provocative image kept surfacing as I drove to the Y. I had done some early morning swims in the past and the pool was pretty quiet at that time so I was not too worried about someone seeing us together. I.
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