To her surprise, nobody was looking at either her or the boy. Not even the hawk-eyed school librarian seemed to have noticed."Come on!" the young man whispered. "It's a big sweet thing, and my balls are gonna bust!"He nudged her foot with his under the table. She looked at him. He was red-faced and was giving her a silly, slightly embarrassed expression. He was one of the school football players, and not all that bad looking."It's big," he whispered. "And it's hot; and it's all yours."Pam squeezed her bare legs together under her skirt. She was greasy and hot between the pussylips. Even though she'd spent the night jerking off, having one orgasm after another, today she was hornier than ever. She'd been constantly horny ever since Saturday afternoon in Jeff's van, and it seemed that the more she came the hornier she got. She gazed at the big, husky football player across the table from her, salivating as she tried to imagine what his cock looked like, what it would feel like between. But what does it mean? Being selfish? So be it. I didn’t want to share Maddie when she was mine and even now that she wasn’t, I wanted her all to myself. It made me feel sick, guilty, gave me a violent shock to see her with someone else. People move on. How could she move on when I hadn’t? Men were the ones who got over things, got into new things, forgot the past while girls were meant to take longer, using up boxes of tissues and watching fucking rom-coms while eating chocolate, getting fat and listening to power ballads. But Maddie looked fine. She looked like a new version of herself. When we were together, she never bought regular coffee. She’d buy packets of the little capsules that you’re supposed to put in Nespresso machines. Only she didn’t have a regular coffee machine, let alone a Nespresso. She’d use the coffee like instant coffee and even though it didn’t dissolve, she’d somehow drink every last bit. In that moment, I found myself wondering if all that strong coffee.
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