"I read your ad. I'm a black male, well hung, looking for a white woman. If you're interested, reply." The first thought in my mind was, "Whatever, dude," but I didn't delete it. I figured I'd show it to Pete later that night when he got back. Well, of course, I totally forgot, with supper and all - I even forgot I hadn't trashed it until I checked my email the next day. I read it again, and a devilish thought popped into my head. I typed back, "How well hung are you?" and sent it off. A few minutes later an instant message popped up as I was surfing - from him! "Ten inches long, and seven around. Interested in a picture." What? Ten inches? No way," I thought, and typed, "Sure, go ahead and send one."A few minutes later, a picture of a big, fat black cock was plastered on my screen. "Whoah," I said. "That's a big fucking cock," I wrote back."Think you could handle it?" Well, I don't know what my husband would say." Fuck that shit. I don't do no threesomes with another guy." Sorry,. They'd step on me like a bug." So what you're saying is you can't do it all by yourself, that you're no Superman," he said, paging idly through my American Lit book. "The Lone Ranger is outgunned and outflanked." Pretty much," I said, shoulders slumping. "I feel like I am letting Ms. McCarthy down."I sighed and went back to my typing when the literature anthology, "Heritage of Liberty" flew through the air and smacked my in the side of the head. "Ow!" I said, a little shocked but not all that surprised. Uncle Mike liked to make his opening arguments non-verbally."You are, you little prick," he said, not meanly. "So you can't take these bastards Gardener and Bell all by yourself. Is the only way to solve a problem? A one-man charge? What's that old Simon and Garfunkel song, 'You Are a Schmuck, You Are An Island'." With all the asses you've saved at that sorry pile of bricks you call a 'high' school, you don't have any friends, any allies? It's just you and nobody else?" he asked..
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