Just one time: one night. I don't know what sort of mood got us to try it: I know we'd been drinking. And silly: we'd been silly that night. And somehow it had happened. And the next morning, I'd found myself lying in my bed, shaking with embarrassment.Me with a woman! Leah! My best friend for years! The horror of that morning still haunts me: what was going to happen? How could I face her?I should have called her right away: talked to her. But that's not me: I found myself avoiding her. Slipping away when I saw her coming, coming up with an excuse to get away whenever she started a conversation. But inevitably she noticed what I was doing. And caught me once, as I was trying to slip away. I still remember her words: "Don't leave."So serious. Leah asking me not to leave when I'd just told her I was late for, well, something or other. She tried to lighten things up again by telling me she just wanted a second to tell me something. I didn't answer: just felt panic inside. She was going. I decided to back off and deal with her later."I didn't come here to ruin your evening," I said. "I didn't even know you were coming here tonight. I just stopped for a beer on my way home. I was as surprised to see you here as you were to see me. Go ahead and join your friends. I'll sit here and finish my drink and go home."I watched Dee and her friends go into the back room while I sat at the bar doing a slow burn. I was so angry that my hand was shaking. I needed to calm down so I did what I always do to calm myself, I ordered a double bourbon. I had finished my second double bourbon and had put away a half of my third beer when I decided it was time to head home.As I walked toward the door, I peeked into the back room. Some of Dee's work associates were seated around a few tables they had pulled together and some were on the dance floor. Dee was among those on the dance floor. I didn't know the guy she was dancing with but I did know they were dancing way too close together for my.
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