Sleep was once again an afterthought.I crawled into bed, starting with her toes. Ten perfect soldiers, adoring red helmets, waiting for battle. I kissed her big toe first, watching it wiggle from contact. I didn't dive bomb on them, just dropped little lip salutes upon each of their heads, moving upwards. She hummed a muted approval as I moved upwards, tickling her calves with my beard stubble. I rose up to check on her, she was still slumbering, or a damn fine actress. I followed my path back to her calves, taking my time to savor what I've been missing. She tasted divine, a cornucopia of soft flesh, new growth of baby hair since her last shave. I took in every detail with renewed interest, storing them away in my mind. I listened to her deep breaths as she still slumbered, a barely audible wind.I backtracked off the bed, walking around the mattress till I stood above her. I stared down at her as she slept. Her lips parted slightly, eyes closed but not shut, so I knew she. .. no... ," I said, shaking my head. "I would never do that. Surely you know me better than that, Dory. All those times when I kept my hands to myself. I thought you understood. You were the leader, I was the follower. If you said no, then it was no. End of story." I know. I ... I'm sorry too, Stevie. I didn't want to break up with you. You're my best friend ... or at least ... you were. I screwed up, didn't I?"Well, at least she was back to calling me "Stevie" again. That was a big step. My eyes were beginning to tear up. I was blinking like crazy trying to clear them, but it was hopeless. I could feel the tears trickle down my cheeks.She was over to me in a flash, her arms around me and holding me close. I pulled my head back and could see through the watery blur that she was in tears as well. I kissed her and she kissed me back and we held onto each other while we got all our regrets out of our system. Maybe I was a sissy, but Dory was important to me. More important than I wanted.
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