Even if nothing falls out at least we tried."Okay." I move on whilst that?s being done. "I?m just sucking itsnose to clear the airway and provide noxious stimulus. To start upbreathing." I was aware I sounded like I was reciting a textbook. Ithink that is because I probably was."It?" I was wondering if she?d notice my avoidance of pronouns. "Whatis ?it??" Kristi demands."That?s for you to see in a minute once we?re stable." Can?t you just tell me?" But it?s not aggressive, more frustration."I haven?t looked myself," I lie.Nothing much happens in response to my nasal suction. Weak breathingeffort is about the best of it. I feel the base of the baby?sumbilicus. (The belly button.) The best place to feel a pulse on anewborn. "The heart rate is slow and baby?s breathing effort is poor,Kristi. I?m assisting breathing."I hook the baby up to our Neopuff positive pressure ventilatingdevice."Are you going to need to intubate?" Kristi asks. Craning to see.She?s doing a good job of not becoming. I wondered if she had any idea of what I had in store for her.She talked about how boring her family was and asked me if her mom liked to have fun when we were her age. I smiled and told her that her that her mom was a lot of fun when she was younger, and that she was the best big sister anyone could ever have. We walked around a curve in the beach, far from the crowded beach. "Jaden sweetie," I smile at the earnest young girl next to me, "Do you know why I really invited you out here on this little walk?" "Umm, I, I think," Jaden whispered, “Aunt Rebecca, ar-are we, umm, are we going to kiss again?"“ Jaden, sweetheart, I hope we're going to do a lot more than just kiss. Would you like that hun?” "No! You and me- I mean you and I. Aw, that would be just… wrong! Wouldn’t it!? " Jaden said in a hushed squeal, grabbing my arm.“Why what on earth would make it wrong, baby, have you ever thought of having sex with another girl?” I asked nonchalantly. "A-auntie, sometimes, I think about.
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