'puter technology on Sol was ahead but the USN didn't have the latest; the Senate, for reasons of self preservation had starved the USN of the best equipment; but there was a quality in numbers and there Sol was way ahead. Variables too many to make sound assessment but it really boiled down to how much interest the southwest held for the Solarian states — moderate at present.Interesting times...."Sundowner" swung through back into the "independent" Cluster after a very successful stopover in Inverness. The musicians' gigs had done extremely well and the feel from the local young people was they wanted to be able to control their own destinies but outside interests were putting their spokes in.The same attitude prevailed during the progression through New Spain, Fort, Goya, Cardinal and Walton's Star where TJ met up with Bill Hitchen again.Bill had gone up in the world and was Fleet Captain now with his own command, a CA, which Bill cheerfully admitted would last about ten minutes. My life is nothing like I expected it to be.I'm not talking about the fact that I'm a girl. I chose that. I went toBikini Beach on my eighteenth birthday and bought a lifetime pass. I knewwhat I was doing. I did it because I liked the sex.I know that sounds pathetic. Like I allowed base desires to control themost profound choice I will ever make in my life. But it really wasn't anymore complicated than that. I never had a feminine epiphany. I neverthought I was a woman trapped in a man's body. I didn't have familyrelationships that abruptly improved because I became a girl. I wasn't aloser guy whose head got turned by becoming attractive and popular. Beinga girl wasn't something I wanted my whole life.My friend Mike and I discovered Bikini Beach by accident.The surprise isn't that I ended up becoming Tasha. I really believed Imade that choice with my eyes open. I just expected a very differentoutcome.* * *It started the day Mike and I were driving back home from a summerfootball.
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