“Costs too much!”These are compliments of J & B.Paraprosdokianis a figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence is unexpected - and oft times humorous:1. If I had a dollar for every girl that found me unattractive, they’d eventually find me attractive.2. I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for freedom, until they’re flashing behind you.3. Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool, so I gave him a glass of water.4. Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.5. I’m great at multi-tasking--I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once.6. If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.7. Take my advice - I’m not using it.8. My wife and I were happy for twenty years; then we met.9. Hospitality is the art of making guests feel like they’re at home when you wish they were.10. Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.11. Ever stop to. Randy really liked how the guys dominated the women and I told him that I preferred the submissive role and if I was a girl I would want a guy to tell me to suck his dick and give him some pussy. He called me a fag and told me to shut up. I.knew he had a girlfriend so I asked if she ever did that and he said no. So I took a chance and told him if I was his girlfriend I would suck his dick and give him some pussy. He sarcastically said oh baby. I told him that I was serious and that I wanted to act like the women in the porno. He said oh baby come over here! I stood up and took my clothes off. I played with my big tits and asked if he liked them. He said he wanted to squeeze and suck them. I said oh baby that makes my pussy wet..I told him that I wanted to show him my tight pussy. I bent over, slapped my fat ass and then spread my ass cheeks apart and showed him my tight hole. I sat on the couch and told him to come sit beside me. He took his clothes off and told me to lay down. Randy.
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