Lying there afterward, she whispered to me, ‘You were perfect. You knew exactly what I wanted done, and just when I wanted you to do it.’ And I realized that, yes, that was exactly what had happened. I had been trying to see what would please her, and I didn’t notice, during, how well it was working. This changed a lot of things for me. I realized that what I had created, because of how it worked, was a temporary one-way love potion. Not an aphrodisiac, not exactly. There’s a lot of talk about what love is, partly because it’s a lot of things. Or gets used a lot of ways. Between two adults it should mean putting your center outside yourself, putting someone else’s interests up with yours or ahead of them. And this way I could know what a women wanted to hear or to do or to have done to her. This meant that for a woman, as long as we were together and the potion worked, I was the perfect lover. And she was a very enthusiastic one in response. I suppose this meant that I could have had. Rory’s eyes widened. “You’re kidding, right? Pizza and carrots?”“What do you suggest?” I asked, feigning innocence.“Real food. Anything but frozen pizza.”Hunting through the overfilled fridge, I excavated two thick pork chops and set about cooking.Through the kitchen window, light was fading. Rain fell in a steady drizzle yet the temperature was still hot, air suffocating. With pork on the cast iron grill, I opened slatted kitchen windows and turned on the ceiling fan hoping for air circulation.When we sat down to eat, Rory tilted her head and studied me. Eventually, I asked, “What is it?”“Where’s the wine?”“What wine?”“You said we could have wine with dinner tonight.”I couldn’t remember agreeing to that. While I never denied her alcohol in the theory that denying her at home would make her want to consume it away from home, wine was rarely served. Usually it would be a beer.“When did I agree to that?”“Yesterday, when we were sitting on the patio. I asked if we could have wine with.
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